The Best Thing Since Sliced Bread and WiFi
by twilightslittleangel
Summary: Agent Barton and Agent Romanoff are hiding something.


**I present you with a fanfiction that I only own the plot of, though it's been used probably a thousand times. Sorry about the length.**

**Nina**

* * *

'Sunlight shone through the windows of the room that Pepper and Agent Maria were helping me get ready in. I'd already gotten them to do my hair and makeup, and they've already changed into their dresses. All is left is for me to get changed. I let them help me into my impractical dress before they go get the bouquets. When I see the flowers, and notice how most of them are purple, my heart speeds up a bit. Not that it's already pounding away. I can fight, and kill, hundreds and thousands of men and aliens without getting scared, but one little wedding can make me lose it. Pepper and Maria go to check on the others, and make sure everyone is in place.

Once they leave, I put on the shoes and go stand in the mirror. My leg feels so empty without a gun strapped to it, so without any haste, I quickly take the one I had in my bag, lift up the skirt and exchange my garter for its holster, so I can feel less vulnerable. I got to choose my dress, but had no idea that this is where the reception was going to be. So naturally, I picked the one with the biggest skirt without a set of hoops in it. In the mirror my pale complexion had darkened a bit, after the one time I made the mistake of sparring with Clint on the roof. He was already tanned from sitting high up on buildings, but I almost burnt my back and arms. What once felt like untameable red hair was now a controlled set of ringlets, topped off with a tiara and my veil.

"Are you ready?" Pepper asked, knocking on the door a few times before walking in. I sighed, and kicked the garter under the mirror. I hope that wasn't as important as she made it sound.

"I guess." Steve was going to walk me down the aisle. Surprisingly, he helped a lot with planning this wedding, maybe because he never got to marry his Peggy, or confess his love. Pepper said nothing about bringing along work, so Cap was wearing his shield on his back.

"This seems the only reasonable way to celebrate two Avengers getting married." Maria and Pepper walked down the aisle now, and the moment seemed to be coming closer and closer. Steve seemed to only be there in case I turned and ran for the hills. I was never okay with a big wedding, even if it was only inviting a few of the SHIELD agents, and all of the living Avengers. It was weird meeting all these people I hadn't worked with yet, like Spiderman and Ms. Marvel.

Clint looked even more handsome than usual, with his tailored suit and a purple bowtie. I did wonder what they had done for his bachelor party, because it was awfully loud on the beach last night. Pepper convinced me not to worry though, because there was no way they could get strippers to this island. Tony, Bruce, and Thor stood in a row behind him. Thor was clutching his hammer, and Tony had already had a few drinks. I saw Pepper shoot him a glance before I was standing before Fury, holding Clint's hands. I was a bit more relaxed. Breathe in, breathe out, it'll be over soon. We said our vows, and eventually it neared the end of the ceremony.

"I can't believe I'm saying this, but you may now kiss the bride." Fury said, chuckling a bit. Clint leant in, and we kissed. I put my hand on his chest, and felt the leather strap of his quiver.

Tony felt that we must have taken too long. "We get the point Katniss, you two love each other very much, now let's get on with it!"

He held out his arm, and we walked down the aisle to the applause of strangers, it seemed, but I was okay with it. For the first time in what felt like forever, I was incredibly happy. I would get to spend the rest of my life with the man I loved; isn't that what all women want, though?

The reception was held indoors, and everything that always happened at weddings took place. If they didn't though, Pepper would be angry, and Steve would have something to say about it. He was all for a traditional wedding, even though he knew that it wouldn't be exactly as he would like it. Pepper was right about the garter, it was needed for a stupid game when Clint would reach up my skirt, take off the garter and fling it at a crowd of single men. Tony was in the crowd though, because he wanted to be able to say he held my underwear, should he catch it. He also forced Bruce and Steve in the crowd, even though they were sure they'd never find someone to love. When they found the gun holster though, Hawkeye started laughing. He came out from under my skirt though, and went to find Pepper.

When he returned, Pepper was incredibly angry. "I thought I told you what you needed the garter for, but I guess you didn't pay attention. I will make Barton throw your holster instead, but I will make sure I intercept it after the fact, and give it back to you after the wedding. Give me your gun." She whispered to me. Nodding to Clint, he went back up my skirt, and took the halter off. I hesitated before giving her my gun.

"Don't hurt my gun, she's precious."

My holster landed at Bruce's feet, and even though we thought for a second he would invite his friend to the party, he managed to get away with a pink face and a few chuckles. Spiderman's date, Gwen, caught my bouquet. Clint stuffed cake in my face, and got crumbs down my cleavage, but I got some in his quiver. I got a dance with the other Avengers who had helped defeat Loki. When the party ended, Pepper made me change, gave me back my gun, and wished me the best on my honeymoon. Hawkeye and I were flown to an airport on Fury's way back to the headquarters in NYC, and we caught our next plane to Budapest, were we had rented a house for a few weeks. It was wonderful.'

Natasha felt accomplished, and as she finished the few final touches on her story, before saving it and opening a web browser to upload it onto Fanfiction. She knew that this story was purely fanfiction, but that was the point. She wouldn't have written it for any other reason. Putting it up on the website, she went to go find her partner. On her way to his room, she couldn't help but over hear Tony getting excited about something.

"You guys would never believe what I found! It is the best thing since sliced bread and Wi-Fi!" Tony said very loudly, waving around his phone, and interrupting the silence that was in the room. Bruce was scribbling on a notepad, while Thor and Steve were playing chess. Clint was sitting on top of the bookshelf, with a book and a beer. At least he wasn't sitting on top of the refrigerator again, or on one of the metal supports of the windows on the top floor. Banner stopped scribbling on his notepad.

"What did you find?" Bruce asked, tucking his pen behind his ear.

"So I was really bored, and I went onto the internet. That's when I found this site called Fanfiction, and you'll never believe what I found! Actually, you will. Someone out there thinks like I do, that Merida and Widow are totally involved."

"Well I don't know what you mean, so do elaborate." Steve said, sitting up straight.

"All forty of these stories describe the romance between Clint and Natasha. Except they haven't happened, or have they?" Tony passed a glance to Hawkeye, but he was still reading his book. Fed up with this ignorance, Stark took Barton's book. That surely got his attention. "Are you and Romanoff hiding something from the rest of us?"

"No, just our personal lives. That's all." A feminine voice said, from the doorframe of the room. Clint took his book back, but folded the page he was on, and listened in.

"Whoever wrote these stories seems to know an awful lot about the Avengers. I didn't know that Ms. Marvel was part of the Avengers until I read this." Steve looked at Bruce like he was mad.

"Am I the only one who's been reading the recent Avengers comics?" Thor looked at him.

"I do, but I usually look at the pictures. The little writing is hard for me to see." With a disgruntled grunt, Tony ignored them. He took back his phone, and locked it.

"I am going to go to my room and think. I might also drink. But don't think I won't be hearing answers from you two!" Clint jumped down from his bookshelf once Stark left, and went down the hall to his room. Thor and Steve started talking about comic books, discarding their chess game for a while. Bruce resumed scratching notes onto his paper. Agent Romanoff wanted to avoid the awkward silence, and walked out, going to Barton's room. Pulling out a bobby pin, she opened the locked door.

"I had an idea today. We should delete our fanfiction account before they figure out our secret." Clint looked at her, and she felt butterflies in her stomach. For someone who didn't like to portray emotions, she sure did know what love felt like.

"No. We made this account together, and if they find out, it will just mean that we can kiss without worrying about them thinking the world was ending. Plus, I always did want to have a traditional wedding, with a white dress and a priest of some sort." She sat down beside him, leaning her head on his shoulder. One arm wrapped around her waist.

"You're such a romantic."

"I know." They kissed before Natasha darted away, trying to make sure everything stayed inconspicuous. She didn't want to kill Captain 1940's for trying to kill her for not having a traditional wedding. If she had stayed a few more seconds, Tony Stark would have walked in and their secret would have been totally blown. But Clint had to deal with the awkwardness that Tony created when he walked into his room.

"Alas, I have caught you! With this camera I shall have proof! Mwhahahaha!" He pressed the button on the hot pink camera, and the flash went off. Once the brightness wore off, Clint stood up, and walked out of the room.

"You need to stop spending so much time with Thor."

Weeks passed, and Natasha felt more and more confident that no one would catch on. She spent a lot of time with Clint, but most of the time it was spent alone in another part of the city. Stark had initiated Operation Evidence, and had blackmailed Bruce and Steve into helping with it. Thor was too busy, rereading all of his comics, and paying attention to the words. One night, when Clint and Natasha had gone out on a 'private mission', he decided to hold the first meeting.

"You all know why we are here-"

"We're here because you black mailed us!" Steve stated, but keeping his cool so that nothing stirred the green party. Tony glared at him, before going back to the whiteboard he had dragged into the main lounge they were in.

"I'm going to give you each a camera, and if you catch those two together, take a picture and every night we will exchange pictures. Pay close attention to the eyes and the hands. Now when they get back I want someone hiding in front of Katniss' room, and Spider lady's room. Or tomorrow I will upload the video I took of you two drunk. I don't want to have to do that."

The secretive couple returned around one in the morning, absolutely tired. Fury had sent them out to go capture a mafia leader, and sent a few of the new rookies, so that they could get a feel for the field. So they were stuck flying a little jet with four easily excitable, pretentious know-it-alls who were fresh from the ovens. But at least they were helpful and followed orders when they finally got to their destination.

"I could use a shower. Agent Barton, care to join me?"

"Yes and no. I need to get some sleep, but I will be taking a shower." They stopped in a janitor closet for a quick kiss and then hurried to their rooms, so no one would see them. Stark had heard them though, and even though he had no proof, he was going to get them to admit to it.

Natasha couldn't fall asleep though, even after her shower. Every time she closed her eyes, she saw Clint going up against the mafia leader they had gotten rid of. He had been intimidating, and seemed very well armed. Plus, her bed felt much too big, and not at all comfortable. Slipping on a t-shirt she had stolen from Clint's room, she snuck down the halls. Clint certainly did fall asleep like he had said he would, but looked very restless. Slipping into the bed, she snuggled against him, feeling his warmth. Both of them slept well, and didn't wake up at night.

"Good morning sleeping beauty." Clint muttered under his breath, when he woke up to find that someone had crawled into his bed while he slept. He swung his legs over the edge of the bed, and padded down to the kitchen to get two cups of coffee. He didn't feel left out as the only shirtless man in the kitchen, but he did have the best pajama pants. Once he got back the room, he noticed a shirt that had been flung on the ground. When Natasha decided it was time to get up, he had already had to go back to the kitchen to fill up his coffee.

"I got you a cup, but it might be cold."

"That's okay, and if it is cold I'll go refill it myself. Sorry about sneaking in last night, but I couldn't sleep." Clint nodded his head, and put down his book.

"If you're going to the kitchen, you're going to need to put on something less revealing. Steve might choke on his orange juice if you go in your underwear." Natasha sat up too, sipping her coffee. Putting it down the side table, she leant over and gave Clint a kiss.

"I love you." Three quick knocks on the door startled the happy couple. Thankfully it was Steve who had knocked, so when he opened the door he blushed and closed it again.

"I guess you win this time Agent Barton. Go start planning the ceremony.

"So is Clint coming to the showing tonight? I hear that these things are really fun, plus it will help get you to understand the modern day!" Steve stood at the table awkwardly, as Tony sipped from his gold coffee mug.

"He was busy, so I didn't ask him." Just at that moment, Bruce came back from going to ask Natasha about the movie.

"Was Natasha in on the movie?" Tony was starting to get annoyed. Bruce stood next to Steve, and looked just as ashamed.

"She wasn't in her room. I even checked the workout room, and she wasn't there either." Rinsing his cup and putting it in the sink, Tony walked down to Clint's room, with the other two following him like lost puppies. Three knocks and he opened the door.

"I knew it! I knew they are together!" Tony shouted. Natasha took a sip of her coffee, and leaned her head on Clint sleepily.

"Yes, we are together. While you're up, Stark, can you take my coffee cup to the kitchen? Thanks." He held out his mug, and Tony took it and left. "Well, you made quite the effort to keep this a secret."

"I was trying to be romantic." She said, before reaching in the pillow case and grabbing the two rings, and gave Clint his.

"Sure you were."

"Do you think we need to tell them about our joint account?" Natasha asked, stretching her arms upwards.

"I don't think they need to know about that."


End file.
